SDAWP SI 2024

Dedication To my first daughter, Emily, for creating so much of this story and shaping who I have become. To my second daughter, Savannah, who opened my mind and taught me to love again. Prologue As Chris paced back and forth in the heat grumbling to himself about the car problems, I secretly observed him through the windshield. Who really is this man?   After several minutes, he poked his head inside the car and glared at me.  “Are your legs getting sweaty?”  “No, not really.” “Here’s a towel to wipe them off.  Don’t let them touch the seat. Are your shoes in the sand?” he asked. “Be sure to kick your feet together so you don’t bring sand inside the car!” After about 30 minutes the car cooled down, so we continued our journey for the night to Las Vegas. I looked forward to the cool relief from my nausea. We arrived in Las Vegas around 5:15 pm and inched along one of the busy downtown boulevards, searching for cheap hotels. The sun beat down hotter than ever. Sudden...

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Unearthing Treasures

  Readying to Do the Work of the Educator

Burn Last night, I fell asleep wishing for the world to burn.  The truth is, grief did not make me strong or loving or heroic.  It did not give me purpose. It did not provide reason. It did not give me clarity.  Grief is grotesque. It ravaged me from the inside out.  And when my grief bubbles up in my throat - I wish for the world to burn.  Because I am shackled to my grief. It is a straightjacket of hopelessness, of anguish, of rage, of guilt. Burn . It would be easier if it all burned .  Today, I woke up with a quieter grief.  A quiet grief that is nestled deep in my bones.  A grief that is one with the marrow.  A grief that cradles me in her lap, whispering, someday you will see that I am love . It’s been five years since I said goodbye to you, baby brother.  I didn’t think I'd make it 5 minutes.  But I did.  Then I didn't know if I'd make it in five hours, but I did. Then five days, five weeks, five months, and five years....

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What To Expect When You're Expecting,To Buy A House By: Tori Ralyea Just a condo. Just a townhouse. Just an apartment sixteen stories high. A house not our own. With cars honking, trash overflowing. Broken elevators, broken gates, and no pets allowed,except for a price. The faint arguing heard through the paper thin walls. Renew your lease-that's another ten percent increase. Just a house lined in a row, a space for all of us to go, more expensive than long long ago. In February 2024, when the housing market in San Diego was still mostly atrocious and interest rates were at record highs, we decided to start out our adventure to buy a house in the most desirable, most sought after, most competitive place to live in America. My first thought was: It will be fine… right? I grew up in Los Angeles’s pleasant but bland suburbs, where the only thing happening in our little town was Six Flags Magic Mountain. You were forced to love roller coasters...

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